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    3/07/2008

    决不离开

     

     

     那个地方  我 决不离开
       除非...

       虽然不是第一个进那间屋子
       但是却是怀着满腔期待
       一定要在那里寻找满满的幸福、友情、真诚
       第一个打扫 第一个睡那个地方的人

       虽然无数次地想逃避
       但是  我  决不离开
       除非...
       凭什么到最后  最早狼狈离开的却是我
       就算再苦再累再委屈再不爽  我都 决不离开
       除非...

       接受不了强颜欢笑的伟大
       接受不了自己那样 也接受不了在意的人那样
       伪装不了明明觉得这样却可以做得那样
       明明觉得假却可以做得很真
       伪装不了自己更不爽在意的人那样
       无论是对我还是对与我无关的其他

       因为  那让我无法逃脱地觉得
       我的幸福正在被别人复制  

       也许  大家都觉得我这只是假清高 假纯粹
       但是没办法 做不到就是做不到 接受不了就是接受不了
       那么
       只能泡在自己的世界里沉默

       真的累了 真的受不了了
       哀莫过于心死
       绝望
       我要放弃了

       放弃那份期待
       放弃所谓在乎
       对所有人所有事
       我真的  受不了了

       所有在乎的人、事都有他们的苦衷理由原因
       可是 在那苦衷理由原因里
       却怎么怎么也找不到我的影子
       我理解
       但是殊不知 就是那该死的苦衷理由原因
       让我更有被甩被摔的感觉
       所以
       我要放手了

       不再挣扎 不再彷徨 不再忧伤
       不再寻找 不再期待

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